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June 2021

A problem shared

I like to talk about my problems. To give voice to them. To allow them to exist. To own them. To be honest about them. It lets me feel free. It reminds me that I expand far beyond the bounds of my problems. I use this as a place to talk about my problems quite… Read More »A problem shared

Sounded goaty

I’ve been awake since 3:33am, after waking inexplicably from a dream about my ex where he required my reassurance that being attracted to a person who may not identify as a traditional gender wasn’t ‘weird’. Which is interesting, considering neither of us are particularly gender conforming individuals, but during our relationship we somehow got sucked… Read More »Sounded goaty

Eighty-fucking-five

I got my master’s thesis grade this week. I’m normally pretty accurate at ‘marking’ my own work – I can often predict within a few percentage points what my mark will be, and I can usually guess what the feedback will be too. In this case though, I have legitimately spent four weeks thinking I… Read More »Eighty-fucking-five

Intrusive

An inconsequential thing happened today that my mind refuses to let go of. My son and I went to a National Trust estate for the day, and along one of the boundaries was a field full of horses. Before heading home, we went and sat overlooking them to have a drink and a snack. There… Read More »Intrusive

Stationary Direct

I handed in my thesis report just before my birthday last month, as my derailed subway car skidded through the station with a deafening screeching, and sparks flew all around. Then it was a case of waiting for the thing to come to a stop so I could disembark. Up to that point I’d thought… Read More »Stationary Direct

White knuckles

I wrote this on the 27th April and then rode the subway car on into the abyss without a backward glance. Lately, life has been feeling like riding on a rickety subway car, with no seats and no glass in the windows, along an old derelict tunnel. I’m sort of white knuckling the handrail as… Read More »White knuckles