Tweet tweet

I have waded into Twitter.

It seems a weird time to do that. Not because I have particular opinions on how Elon is managing things, given my up-to-this-point complete lack of investment, but more just because…Elon is managing things. And my coincidental presence feels like a statement that I’m not qualified or inclined to make. I will admit I probably veer more toward the Elon-fanboy category than away from it – I would rather trust him than many of the other options. But I know fucking nothing, so make of that as little as it warrants.

So why have I waded into Twitter?

I’ll be frank. It’s because I watched Lex Fridman on Andrew Huberman’s podcast and it reminded me how much I fucking love the guy, and how from the moment I heard him speak I believed in his integrity, and from the moment I heard him speak about love I was thrilled to hear those kinds of words out of, well, anyone’s mouth except my own, but specifically an intelligent, rational man’s mouth. And it turned out a lot had happened since I decided it would be weird to tune into an artificial intelligence podcast just to hear his voice. He’s kind of a bigger deal now. And he even talks to psychologists.

So, naturally, I then immersed myself in his content to explore whether this admiration and, dare I fucking say, desire I felt, persisted.

And it did. So that told me some things. Not least that I am not in fact beyond having a proper fucking crush on someone. It hadn’t happened for a fucking while, so I was beginning to wonder. But of course I wanted to investigate the underpinning factors, given the fact I am unlikely ever to meet the man, let alone actually know him.

And what I learned, first, was that I wanted to be the kind of person that would attract a person like Lex Fridman. And what I learned, next, was that I am not, necessarily, not the kind of person that would attract a person like Lex Fridman. And what I learned, then, was that, regardless of that, there are things I admire about Lex Fridman that I would like to integrate into my own character, and that is more important to me than attracting anyone else into my life.

And so I wanted to scout for any opportunities to submit a question to him about something he has mastered that I have not. And Twitter seemed to be the obvious way.

So. after this extended meander, I arrived at Twitter to find that, of course, I had already been there and forgotten about it, when I intended to explore Writers’ Twitter. I have, in actuality, visited Twitter on a number of occasions, armed with a number of email addresses, and with a number of intentions…but none of it amounted to anything.

Yet there I was again, and this time, for some reason, without much thought, I fucking replied to a Lex Fridman post, and went about my day. Now, I absolutely acknowledge that is not remotely a big deal, objectively speaking. But, like I said, I’ve been to Twitter many times, and always I’ve felt deeply uncomfortable with the idea of actually engaging; fucking hell, no fucking thank you very much. And that’s why nothing came of it.

So, now I’m living in a new fucking reality, why fucking stop there? There are photos of space to comment on in awe, and writing prompts to indulge myself in ’til the cows come home. I am being conservative with it. Sort of. Maybe. I don’t fucking know. But, I’m there, and it doesn’t paralyse me to consider posting a tweet. So tweet I fucking shall.

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