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empathy

When you’re too small

The impetus for me writing about the insane double bind I place myself in when contemplating the notion of interacting with the world was the crisis unfolding in Afghanistan. Because I wanted to write about it, but how could I possibly have value to add? I know nothing. And, unlike some world events of recent… Read More »When you’re too small

Sympathy

Recently, I talked about misplaced sympathy. But, actually, I think I have a bit of a problem with even arguably well-placed sympathy. Sympathy, to me, is a crutch for people incapable of empathy. There is a world of difference between “aw, poor dear” and “there, but for the grace of God, go I”. Sympathy is… Read More »Sympathy

Dicky-Dancing

I take too much responsibility for other people’s feelings. I’m excruciatingly tuned in to how other people are feeling. It took me a long time to learn that a whole bunch of those feelings are nothing to do with me. People are complicated creatures living complicated lives, and they didn’t just emerge from the abyss… Read More »Dicky-Dancing

Straight lines

Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries. I’m bad at boundaries. Most people I know are bad at boundaries. Is that because most people are bad at boundaries? Or because only people who are bad at boundaries can tolerate people who are bad at boundaries? I notice, when I try to instate or uphold healthy boundaries, that a lot… Read More »Straight lines